Tippy Toes and Tantrums

Clement with Carts

It is raining hard here and that is somewhat worrisome as Clover's birthday party is outside on Sunday. I hope it stops or else their will be no pony rides - or just very muddy pony rides. A mess either way.

Before the rain began, I ran out to Costco with Rocket to get some party supplies, like pre-sliced apples (yep, I am that lazy). It was one of those days where there are too many old people on the road and in my way. I should note that since having kids, I have become a very cautious driver and have slowed down to about the speed limit. I started out today behind an elderly lady driving even more cautiously and well under the speed limit - she was going 20 mph in a 30 zone. I was fairly close to her, but not in an aggressive way, in more of a this-is-how-fast-my-car-goes-when-not-pressing-the-gas-or-brake way. The lady kept looking at me in the rear view mirror, like I was stressing her out, so I braked slightly and she actually pulled over to let me pass. I was glad she was out of my way, but also felt slightly bad that this woman took me as an aggressive driver.

Costco was buzzing. Clearly the holiday season is underway, as it was full of people, mostly elderly with a sprinkling of stay-at-home moms. I had Rocket in the bjorn as he has officially outgrown his infant carrier and is now in a regular carseat. The carrier was a bad idea because I had to buy water bottles and juice boxes, which is really awkward with a baby in the front, and there was no one around to help. I had hoped that there would be a man or two nearby that I could ask for help - this is sexist, but I was telling my husband that I am totally comfortable asking a man for help (one guy even pulled his car over recently when I couldn't lift a firesafe out of my cart and into my car - I don't know what I was thinking when I bought it), but I wouldn't ask a woman in this situation. I don't know if I feel that if another woman can do it, than I can too or if it is just a worry that not all women may be up to the task. For instance, my mom cannot lift heavy items, so asking someone like her wouldn't work.

As we cruised around Costco, my cart was almost hit several times by out of control drivers, especially those aggressively trying to edge out the other shoppers as they hurry toward a free sample. A mom cut me off to get the last Cinnabon sample...which was pointless because I didn't want the sample, I just wanted to get down the aisle she was completely blocking with her cart. Then I was forced to stand and watch as she fed her young daughter the sample, while continuing to block the aisle, despite knowing that I was waiting. Just move over! And I don't understand why people park their cart in the middle of an aisle, then walk toward the side to check out an item. The store is busy; move the god damn cart with you.

Clement is a busy street in San Francisco, it is an Asian neighborhood full of restaurants and shops and far too few parking spots. Driving down that street is crazy as all drivers seem to adopt an anything goes attitude. I remember crossing intersections on Clement where I would just pull my car out and hope for the best because even when the streets looked clear enough, something insane and illogical almost always happened. In college, a friend and I went to Costco and my friend remarked that Costco was a lot like Clement Street with carts. It is so true, especially during the holiday season when most people don't seem to give a fuck.

We made it out of the store and to the car with 10 minutes to spare before picking up Clover at school. As I was about to pull out of my parking spot, the elderly lady in the Denali next to me backed up, so I waited and continued to wait because after reversing her car, she had to make a million adjustments, including putting on her seat belt, before putting the car into drive. Why didn't she do this before backing up? And better yet, why does she need a Denali?

Not Safe at Any Speed

Old people driving can be a huge menace, that is nothing new. My sister and I call each other after particularly annoying experiences involving an elderly driver, always surprised that many people are allowed to continue driving when they can barely walk or hear. Once as a teenager stuck in traffic on my small hometown's main street with a friend and her mom, I told them about my Great, Great Aunt Carmella and how she is such an unbelieveably slow driver who insistes that a speed limit is a maximum speed only to be reached in an emergency situation, like an ambulence (probably with an old person inside!) on it's way to the hospital. I would feel my blood pressure rise when traveling with Carmella as she hovered around 17 mph. As I finished the story, we passed the source of the traffic, a car that finally reached a left turn lane and was waiting for the light to change -- driven, of course, by Carmella.

Anyway, I haven't called my sister about this one yet, but I have never seen anything like what I saw today. I was behind a slow moving car driven by an old man. As I passed it, I looked over and saw that his head was completely bandaged up, and so thoroughly bandaged that it almost looked fake, like when kids play mummy and wrap themselves with a whole roll of toilet paper. I didn't see any red, so the man was not bleeding. Nor was he anywhere near a doctor's office or the hospital, although it could be he was so disoriented he thought it was near the hospital. His wife was in the passenger seat and I could only imagine the debate between them before getting into the car about who was going to drive and the man angrily insisting he was fine. I think this was one day she should have won.